July 30, 2018

You don’t realize how much you need a lazy day until you have one. I haven’t had a day where I had absolutely no commitments in a loooooooooooooooong time. And damn it sure felt good.

Well… I did have one commitment. I had pre-work for my coding bootcamp to really dive into. I realized that I only have a couple days off that I can really work on my pre-work, especially now that I’ve decided to go to Chicago with my sister next week. I’ll be fine though! I’m making really good headway. I just have MAJOR ADHD when I’m trying to sit down and watch videos about methods and arrays haha. It’s especially hard to sit down when I want to be out walking in the beautiful weather. I used to be so good at sitting down and focusing on homework, but it seems that my study muscles from nursing school are out of shape.

pen calendar to do checklist
Photo by Breakingpic on Pexels.com

Probably not the most effective way to get work done, but between videos and tutorials I ended up doing 3 loads of laundry, grocery shopping, cooking an entire chicken, teaching Schmee how to “stand up” with said chicken, repairing the cat tree in my living room, scrolling endlessly through Facebook (ugh I wish I could delete that app, but it’s not possible on my current phone), chatting with bae, opening a package that I was excitedly waiting on for weeks which ended up being a red sweater that looked absolutely nothing like the picture :(, writing a very frustrated review on said sweater, then writing reviews on my last 15 amazon purchases. Very productive day actually. I also got a lot of pre-work done throughout all of this, so I’m pretty proud :).

Long story short, my lazy day off ended up not actually being so lazy… I don’t think it’s actually possible for me to do nothing all day. However, catching up on all these little things made me feel so organized and re-energized.

Off to sleep! I’m hoping that dealing with all my little chores lets my brain rest. Maybe I can finally get a full 8 hours of sleep.

July 11, 2018

HOLY MOLEY. Waking up at 6am is definitely not a treat for my night-shift brain. However, it was totally worth it! I went to a Women in Tech Symposium hosted by Google and the school I’m going to learn programming through. It was great!!! There were only 2 dudes!!! Hahaha. We started off at like 9am, and I knew I wanted to just put myself out there and talk to a shitload of people. So I did!!! And everyone there was so eager to chat back!!! And I met some very cool ladies, all of different tech and non-tech related backgrounds. I expected a lot more to be enrolled in the programming course I’m in, but there were only a couple alumni and a couple that were interested. I think that added even more to the diversity of the group :).

woman showing presentation pie chart
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

As a very basic summary, we did different sessions that focused on things like how to emphasize your accomplishments and skills, building resumes, how to build your brand, and understanding barriers to women in a male-dominated field. I thought the latter was especially interesting because my current position as a nurse is obviously extremely female dominated. Yet, even though only 10-20% of my coworkers are male (and even less now on the oncology unit), I’ve still experienced many extremely uncomfortable and creepy neck/shoulder massages at work from one of male nurses that I needed to formally confront. But there’s all sorts of things of things to keep your eye out for in the workplace, and it was interesting hearing people’s experiences.

Needless to say, it was very informative! I’m so glad I went! And the moment I got home, I crashed. I’m glad I got some sleep, but I woke up suddenly from a really upsetting dream about an owl that flew away carrying someone’s cat. I was so upset, throwing things at the owl until I just woke up. So after that, I just stayed up and loafed around, watching Star Trek.

THERE IS ONE GREAT STORY I WILL LEAVE YOU WITH, HOWEVER. My wonderful, asshole cat, Schmee was hanging out, watching TV with me. He starts licking himself,

black cat holding persons arm
Photo by Ruca Souza on Pexels.com

doing whatever cat-things, when I look up to see his head flailing around. What the fuck, Schmee? Apparently, he somehow got his bottom jaw stuck under the brand new collar I bought for him LOL. OH MY GOD, I DIED LAUGHING. I knew he was gonna try to claw the shit out of my arm the second I tried to undo the collar; as previously mentioned, he is indeed an asshole. But I couldn’t even stop laughing long enough to help him. Maybe I’m the asshole lol. Finally I got it loose, and I also got some pretty sick red lines up my arm. Lol, I love that lil guy :).

And there ya go. It’s almost 5am so that’s about 24 hours in four paragraphs haha.

July 2, 2018

I guess I’ll be writing more about yesterday than today, technically. I had such a great time at Derek’s house :). It’s been probably over six months since I’ve even been there, thanks to his work being so conveniently located near my apartment.

His brother is also going to be in the coding bootcamp that I originally signed up for starting this month, so Derek, he and I were dissecting his prework and working on it on of his projects. I’m not gonna lie, I was a little discouraged by my difficulty understanding a few of the concepts. Derek’s brother seems like a real natural at coding and understanding abstract concepts quickly…and it was really hard not to compare myself to him. Even though it was a little discouraging, it makes me want to work extra hard to really understand programming. I feel like being a girl in a male-dominated industry, I have to work a little harder to prove myself. And it’s going to be much more difficult than starting out in nursing – something that was not especially challenging for me. I’m definitely willing to put in the effort, though. And I think I’m going to reap the rewards and satisfaction when I’m done :).

person looking at phone and at macbook pro
Photo by Christina Morillo on Pexels.com

June 25, 2018

Why is it that I talk about my nursing job all the time with my family? When I’m not around them, I rarely mention it – and when I do I have nothing good to say about it? It’s like I remember all the little details and stories about my job when I’m talking to my parents especially. I think that’s odd.

All I know is that I’m having so much fun learning how to code. It’s like a challenging fun. I have mini goals that keep me motivated to figure out new ways to solve each problem. For example, right now I’m working on my side project, and I just can’t figure out how to conVERT A BOOL INTO A STRING AHHH. So frustrating because I’ve been working on it for like…3 hours. BUT I WILL FIGURE IT OUT AND IT WILL FEEL SO FUCKING GOOD.

Anyway, I moved my new roommate into my apartment today! I need to give her a name by the way, holy shit…let’s go with uhh….Emma. I’m not gonna tell you real names HAHAHA. HAH. Regardless, that was the easiest move I’ve ever helped with, ever. All she had were a few bags of clothes and a mattress/boxspring. It took maybe 30 minutes to get everything inside. SO EASY. She’s so nice too. I’m excited to get to know her better :).

woman in grey shirt holding brown cardboard box
Photo by bruce mars on Pexels.com

Talking to her makes me think a lot. She’s a little younger than I am, and she’s double majoring in engineering. You can definitely tell she’s very smart… and she takes a lot of pride in pushing herself to do her best, especially as a woman in the engineering field. It just makes me remember how all my life it was always my dream to become a veterinarian…how I decided to switch my major to nursing halfway through my freshman year mostly because I didn’t think I could make it to vet school. Looking back at how easily I made it through nursing school, I definitely could’ve done it. It would’ve been very fucking hard, but I definitely could’ve pushed myself through it (well, I’d still be in school now actually, but still). Part of me wonders why I chose not to push myself…and how I’ll be in a fairly challenging (and male-dominated) profession like computer programming…And I wonder if one day I’ll push myself even harder to get my master’s or go into some sort of software engineering position. I wonder if I’m smart enough to do it well – or would even enjoy it at all. I think that’s what makes me so excited. I don’t know what’s next, but I love every second of exploring who I am and what I might become.